Monday, January 24, 2011

Just Not A Fit.

So I left you hanging.  With the daycare decision, that is.

I backed down.  Again.  I begged, pleaded, and bribed family members to help me cover the two afternoons.

I. Just. Can't. Find. Anyplace. That. Meets. Brian's. Needs.

We visited a few places and they weren't horrible, red-flagged facilities but they just weren't enough.  I'm trying to figure out if I am just a crazy overprotective mom or if my actions and decisions are truly because of Brian's needs.

The first home daycare we visited was a really nice place- as far as cleanliness, safety measures, clear schedule, etc.  But she didn't even try to interact with Brian.  She had no experience with autism.  She seemed devoid of emotion.  It was like the people you see in the store who try to avoid the individual with special needs because they don't know what to do.  And before I even had a chance to badmouth her inability to try to get Brian to open up, Josh pointed it out to me when we retreated back to the car.  So apparently it wasn't in my head, which was a bit of a relief.

The other daycare provider that was a contender also had no experience with autism.  Yet she seemed much more open to talking to Brian.  To looking at him.  Asking him questions despite him completely acting as if she wasn't there.  She was willing to learn.  But her home was cluttered, no real schedule that I could see, and I think the television might be on the entire time.  Also as an older provider, I really was not sure of her ability to pick him up and calm him down if heaven forbid, a tantrum ensued.

An hour of television after school for two days a week isn't going to kill either boy- but to pay someone to plop your child in front of a television kind of doesn't sit well with me.

So we talked about it, Josh changed his schedule a little, and one of my sister's has promised me one out of her two afternoons a week off to cover the days that were up in the air.

Until next time (6 weeks and counting), when I start my next fieldwork placement, we are once again happy being a non-daycare family.


Kathy said...

I can really relate. I have never been able to put my boys in day care. I know that most people do not have a choice, but I am lucky to have family in town.

Lynn said...

Glad that you made it work out. Those options did not sound good. What do other people do? I shudder to think.

natalee said...

Thank god for sisters... you know i am soo following you now!!!

Christina said...

This is the part that sucks the most about being a parent - aganizing over decisions like these. I did an in-home daycare for awhile for Aurora after school last year and it never did sit right with me. I'm glad you were able to work something out!