Monday, August 10, 2009

Could it be 1 in 58 children?

Check out this post at Age of Autism.

This scares me. Really scares me. I don't understand why the CDC and the AAP can't see that there is an exponential rise going on and something, besides genetics, has to be playing a part to make a number rise in such a way.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

27 Things I Love

In honor of me turning 27 on Friday I put together a list of 27 things I love. Completely materialistic type of things. No sappiness in this post.

1. I love yoga pants! I wish I could live in them everyday! Really this is the year that I've become comfortable enough with my bootylicious bottom to wear these type of pants.

2. Pepsi Max. A totally love/hate relationship as the caffeine in it always triggers my anxiety attacks. Always addicted to the things that are bad for you.

3. Trashy reality TV. I try to be a deep person, really, but these shows suck me in.

4. Facebook.

5. My camera- can't go anywhere without it.

6. Mascara- the only item of make-up that I wear every single day.

7. The library. I love books- I love to just walk around and touch all the different books. Weird, I know.

8. Finding a new delicious GFCF recipe!

9. Flossing- weird but I love to do it.

10. Fans- I love to be just a little bit too cold when going to sleep.

11. My bedding.

12. Finding new independent songs that "no one" has heard yet.

13. Karaoke.

14. Guitar Hero.

15. SALES! Nothing like getting a good bargain.

16. Organization. Yet I'm totally unorganized, I don't get it.

17. Sunglasses. Big ones, aviator ones, colored ones, I love them all.

18. My two D&G striped tote bags.

19. Getting dressed up and having no where to go.

20. Big earrings.

21. Planning parties/get-togethers.

22. Feeling independent. I hate to rely on people and it could be a fault to a point sometimes.

23. Funny, sarcastic, ackward humor.

24. Crosswords & Suduko.

25. Spider Solitaire on the computer- absolutely addicted. I have a game of it up at all times.

26. Mini laptops- which I will be getting one in a couple weeks. Can't decide on what color I want though :)

27. Coffee ice cream w/peanut butter cups mixed into it.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Drinking from Invisible Glasses

Today Corbin surprised me by building me a beautiful house. A house made of pillows and blankets in the middle of our livingroom. I climbed inside and immediately Brian & Corbin joined me. I welcomed my guests and told them to make themselves comfortable and I'd get some "cake & tea".

Brian started to climb out of the fort towards the kitchen saying, "Cake, cake". I gently pulled him back in and said, "We're pretending Brian!" I handed Corbin some invisible cake and I took a bite of mine. I handed Brian a piece and he bit into it, imitating Corbin & myself. Not a surprise- nothing new there, he is a mimic.

Next I turned to Brian and said, "Would you like a drink?" Brian said, "Drink." But he didn't move towards the kitchen this time. I handed him an imaginary glass, he lifted the "glass" to his lips, and made an exagerrated swallowing sound. Completely independent. He didn't see anyone do that first. He caught on to our game and PRETENDED to drink from an IMAGINARY glass.

Huge, just huge.

Freedom Riders Online

Freedom Riders, the therapeutic riding organization that Brian goes to, is celebrating 25 years. In honor of that several of our local newspapers did articles on what they do there and to advertise their open house coming up. The Free Press ran some pictures of Brian riding and feeding his pal, Xanadu, along with their article. Check out the link to see! :)

Monday, August 3, 2009

And The Gap Widens

I was thinking to myself last week that all of a sudden I feel like I'm having to explain to a lot of young children why Brian isn't answering them and what autism is. It seemed like I didn't have to do this before. I wondered why it was only now that I was having to figure out how to explain autism to four and five-year-olds. Then I remembered our dear friend, Annie, telling me way back in the beginning that as Brian grew it would become more and more noticeable that he was "different". I think we've got to that point.

He now looks like a big boy. He is a big boy. Kids expect him to talk back to them at the playground. He is five years old and he barely notices the other kids playing around him, he hardly ever looks at them, and he doesn't ever answer them unless it is to repeat the last word of their sentence. He is going into kindergarten in the fall and he is still, within language & social skills boundaries, at about an 18 to 24 month level. The other kids see that he looks like a big boy and they expect him to act as one.

I always feel like I've come to a point where I've accepted Brian- no, I'm not settling- I continue to work and push him but I have accepted that he may not ever talk, he may not progress- but then something will happen and it will hurt me. It's like a shock to my system and I want to cry- for an hour or maybe even a whole day. Cry for the future my son may not have. And it always surprises me when it happens. Because, for the most part, I do feel like I'm past that "grieving" stage but perhaps I won't ever be- it will be a lifetime thing that will just hit me every now & then.