Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Not Exactly Typical

I've been struggling.

Struggling with parenting.

Just a little bit.

And it's not with Brian.  It's with my other son.

I know I've mentioned that Corbin isn't exactly "typical".  He's typical to me because I have another son with such major needs.  But I can't ignore Corbin's needs.

Corbin has articulation problems, phonological deficits, and sensory needs among other things.  Corbin has had professionals throwing around terms like sensory-processing disorder and ADHD since he was just a toddler.  Yet we've never got a diagnosis, which I think is starting to do a disservice for him.

Lately in speech therapy Corbin has been shutting down.  He looks at an activity, decides it will be too hard for him, and starts to shut down.  His eyes tear up, he sticks out that lower chin, and just blocks everyone off.  He does not want to try anything unless he knows he will excel at it.  He hates not doing well and the older he gets the harder things are getting for him. It happens at home too.  Especially when we play a new game or homework is too hard.

His speech therapist loves Corbin.  She loves both of my kids.  She has been a part of our family for about six years now.  And she's worried.  Worried about how we are going to get over this hurdle so it's not a habit he holds on to for the rest of his life.

I'm worried too.  Seeing him struggle has always been hard for me but I feel he is starting to see his struggles, where he didn't before.  And this is even harder for me, because I see the pain in his eyes.  I'm worried about his self-esteem and I try my hardest to let him know his strengths.  I also am clear about everyone's weaknesses, particularly my own.  I stress how important it is to at least try and I try to enforce this by showing him how I mess up at times, but I try again.

This parenting stuff is hard and I'm not too proud to ask for help.  Have you had a similar situation with any of your children?  Do you have any suggestions?